Olym-peeing glory?

The International Olympics Committee has announced that it will amend its medical code, adding marijuana and “other recreational drugs” to the list of banned substances for which athletes must be tested. The move is obviously in response to the Ross Rebagliati affair, as if the young athlete had somehow tarnished the Olympic image with his spectacular gold-medal snowboard run.
Canadian elite athletic director Ann Peel said the whole idea was ridiculous. “There’s a real skewing of priorities going on,” she said. “It’s incredible that the IOC? gets on its high horse about the social issue of marijuana use by an athlete.” At CC we still find it incredible that the RCMP does the same thing in regard to all Canadians.

CC’s advice to concerned cannabis-friendly athletes? Add some cold-pressed hemp seed oil to your diet. Not only will it provide you with the essential fatty acids to zoom past your competitors, but it will also excuse those positive results in your urine test.

Recent studies have revealed that eating hemp seed oil produces false positives on pot-pee tests. Opiate-friendly olympians would do well to remember that eating poppy seeds has a similar effect.