The Amazing Mennonite Marijuana Pipeline

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The Amazing Mennonite Marijuana Pipeline

Secret Mennonite pot plantations in Mexica are Canada’s largest source for importedmarijuana.


The Original Men in Black

The sight of an old style horse and buggy plodding along the shoulder of the highway offers a brief glimpse into another century from the stream of sleek metal zipmobiles whizzing past in such a hurry.

At the reins of the animal-powered time machines are gentle Mennonites who choose to live much as they did a hundred years ago, minus electricity, fossil fuel motors and popular culture. Their strict ethics of hard work, temperance and modest tastes is a startling reminder of how complicated we have made our own existence. The Mennonite way is a hard life, short on modern comforts, but rich in faith and tradition.

Preferring the company of their own close-knit communities, old-style Mennonites tend to shut out the worst excesses of the modern world to live off the loop in their do-it-yourself paradise on the farm. Here, away from the stink and hustle of Babylon, they are free to honour God and community as they see fit. Their independent style is the envy of many who value freedom, but are not as willing to work full time for a lifetime achievement.

In many ways, the Mennonite style represents an ideal existence that is right at home with the dream of a growing number of new-age, alternative lifestyle leaners who aspire to a simple, sustainable, daily life of kindness and purpose.

Who’da thunk the rainbow vegan pagans and the matt-black Mennonites would share core beliefs of consuming less of everything and putting back more than they take out as they pass through human life? This is only one more curious echo in a world of wonder.

Reform with the Golden Rule

Not all Mennonites live the full spectrum of freeze-frame tradition ? many Reform Mennonites live a slightly edited version of the plain code and dwell among the “outsiders” while retaining the essence of Mennonite values at home, in the community and on the job.

These Mennonites are still hard-working, sober citizens nonetheless. They wear blue jeans, go on vacations, might watch a little TV and even enjoy the occasional beer. Of late, some younger Mennonites might share a little marijuana, but it’s hardly a farmyard rave situation.

As long as the premise of the Golden Rule is considered ? temperance and discretion observed at all times ? nobody seems to get upset. Mennonite elders are hip to this phenomena and although they frown on smoking and drinking, these personal choices are not exactly prohibited.

Mennonites may be exempt from military service in Canada, but they go to jail like everybody else if they are caught with marijuana.

Most Mennonites are not interested in pot, and simply ignore it. They are too busy on their prosperous farms, or working among the outsiders as skilled tradesmen, bright teachers or compassionate administrators. Their German heritage of fairness and industry is as easy going as it is efficient. Many Reform Mennonites manage to achieve a comfortable material life without the urban identity anxiety of their neighbors. God remains central, and the family is a close second.

Mennoweed of Wonder

Hard work at farm and factory is necessary to pay the bills of temporal life. On top of this race the Mennonites fund many relief and rebuild projects, which their Mennonite Central Committee operates gratis in third world trouble-spots. Mennonite Disaster Relief teams are unrivaled in their quick response to aiding anybody victimized by fire, flood, earthquake or politics, and often arrive on the scene before government-directed relief agencies can get it together to do likewise.

The cash crunch of the modern era has not spared these gentle people: Mammon plays no favourites. The prospects of growing marijuana for the eager black farm market has become an increasingly important source of income for a handful of Mennonite misfits with dual CanadianMexican citizenship. Their habits of industry and cooperation have been put to good use, developing a major league transcontinental network of marijuana production and distribution which Canada Customs considers one of the biggest and yet hardest to detect.

Mennonite pot grown on plantations in Mexico and delivered to private wholesalers in Canada operates independently of the pyramid network of the “other” vast pot pipeline. Mennonites grow it and flip in onto the market direct, bypassing everything and everybody to do so. The profit margin from this approach is very attractive. So attractive, it would seem, that the lure of lucre overwhelms priority, which presents a serious dilemma for the Mennonite community who are rather horrified that this sort of thing is happening in their midst.

Family Loyalty & Thwarting Authority

The Mennoweed connection is not a few isolated ounces, not by a long shot. Entire families are involved in the Mexican harvest and delivery of tons of high-end bud to the wealthy northern citizens on a regular basis ? two crops a year! Caught with bales of evidence and sacks of cash, the Mennoweedists do not betray their cousins in court, and go to prison with their hearts open and their mouths shut for years, rather than endure one poisonous minute of low regard for loved ones in the shadow of the noose.

A loyalty that is not compromised by a decade in the clink is worthy of admiration. For a people who will not bear arms, on the battlefield or in the pot fields, the choice to participate in the burgeoning world marijuana market is wrought with danger. Cleverness must outperform force, and the cultivation of marijuana is a comfortable accommodation to the uncertainty of the world. One has to wonder about a weed that Mennonites view as worthy pursuit, even though the law of God seems to point in its general direction. Go forth and multiply ? and as ye sow, the same shall ye reap.

Just how out-of-wonk have things become that hamster-hearted people break the law to grow pot? In other centuries, Mennonites chose to flee their farms rather than comply with unreasonable authority. Today they are openly thwarting international prohibition to bring their fragrant bale of herbal dessert to market for top dollar.

The Sons of Harley Davidson

Jim Johnson, Contraband Manager of Customs and Excise, revealed the scale and scope of the Mennonite pot plantations earlier this year, while in a Windsor courtroom, testifying in the trial of a Mennonite family charged with wholesale marijuana smuggling offences.

“A Mennonnite pipeline from Mexico to Canada is the largest source of marijuana being smuggled into this country. It is believed that this organization is the largest group smuggling marijuana into Canada. In spite of our best efforts, seizures have only scratched the surface.” Officer Johnson continued to say that “Some members of the strict, austere and global Protestant sect have developed close connections with motorcycle gangs.”

This has apparently been going down for a number of years, since the mid 1980’s at least. Yet only recently has Mennoweed been recognized as the key commodity zone where the bounty of buds originates.

Three Lost Souls

Three Mennonite men with dual Canadian/Mexican citizenship were recently sentenced to 13 years each in prison for smuggling marijuana from their family-run plantations in Mexico, and bringing the harvest overland across the United States into Canada.

Undercover drug squad officers, following a tip, trailed two vans with Manitoba license plates across the US as far as Detroit. A “controlled delivery” into Canada followed. The vehicles drove to a Windsor, Ontario tattoo shop which the driver briefly visited. The vans proceeded to a Best Western Motel where police raided the room where a Mennonite woman, dressed in old-style garb and with six children, waited. Phone records revealed a call to a Mennonite farm in South West Ontario that was subsequently raided.

Trafficking and importation charges were laid, and police seized a considerable consignment of well-grown, high-potency marijuana, which had been hydraulically packed into welded metal canisters, expertly concealed within the wall panels of the vans, and sprayed with chemical foam to check the rattling over the long overland route and to fool drug-sniffing dogs at two borders.

By Dr Alexander Sumachfinis