first: excellent job in almost all ways.
here are some suggestions from someone who's made a few videos in his life...
second: shorten the lead-ins and all of the "who helped produce this..." on a typical tv intro or finale, each is on the screen for about 2-3 seconds and the whole list might run to ten seconds. long intros lead to channel-flipping and "are we there yet." a little pruniing and tightening will do wonders.
third: the editing and cutting are great except for one or two points i noticed: the sudden detour into "there are pollutants in the world that cause cancer and should be eliminated" is NOT so germane to your thesis: your goal is to get MJ Oil tested, proven and legalized, NOT to attack all of the possible carcinogens in the world and their manufacturers. you don't need the resistance from them all that will come from that segment... lose it or make it part of another video on THAT subject alone.
one of the musical interludes near the end comes before additional expository scenes and is too early and out of place. the closing musical theme is great, but having two at the end might not be better than eliminating the first one and just let all of the expository scenes run right up to ONE "finale".
this is a great message and i wish i could order two tubes for testing on myself and my wife right now. we both have skin conditions and other symptoms which would do well to be tested for treatment by the oil. maybe some day....
i'll be forwarding links to the youtube hour-long version to my US and state government people, just to rub their noses [politely] into the overall situation.
we've seen the same stuff in the US, with the same fears and resistance, virtually all coming from emotional, irrational arguments against the "evil weed."
might i also suggest that the manufacturing process be changed into one done under a protective hood, where the combustible fumes may be collected and exhausted or burned off safely? passing the fumes through a stainless steel fine mesh screen and then ignited usually will prevent a back-flame from getting to the source.
in addition, try to figure out how to make a more continuous process, rather than "batch."
yeah, i've done engineering in my past.
good luck and all the best to you.
alan falk
raleigh, NC, usa
Submitted by alan falk () on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 20:36.
suggestions regarding second edition video
first: excellent job in almost all ways.
here are some suggestions from someone who's made a few videos in his life...
second: shorten the lead-ins and all of the "who helped produce this..." on a typical tv intro or finale, each is on the screen for about 2-3 seconds and the whole list might run to ten seconds. long intros lead to channel-flipping and "are we there yet." a little pruniing and tightening will do wonders.
third: the editing and cutting are great except for one or two points i noticed: the sudden detour into "there are pollutants in the world that cause cancer and should be eliminated" is NOT so germane to your thesis: your goal is to get MJ Oil tested, proven and legalized, NOT to attack all of the possible carcinogens in the world and their manufacturers. you don't need the resistance from them all that will come from that segment... lose it or make it part of another video on THAT subject alone.
one of the musical interludes near the end comes before additional expository scenes and is too early and out of place. the closing musical theme is great, but having two at the end might not be better than eliminating the first one and just let all of the expository scenes run right up to ONE "finale".
this is a great message and i wish i could order two tubes for testing on myself and my wife right now. we both have skin conditions and other symptoms which would do well to be tested for treatment by the oil. maybe some day....
i'll be forwarding links to the youtube hour-long version to my US and state government people, just to rub their noses [politely] into the overall situation.
we've seen the same stuff in the US, with the same fears and resistance, virtually all coming from emotional, irrational arguments against the "evil weed."
might i also suggest that the manufacturing process be changed into one done under a protective hood, where the combustible fumes may be collected and exhausted or burned off safely? passing the fumes through a stainless steel fine mesh screen and then ignited usually will prevent a back-flame from getting to the source.
in addition, try to figure out how to make a more continuous process, rather than "batch."
yeah, i've done engineering in my past.
good luck and all the best to you.
alan falk
raleigh, NC, usa