A Calgary women's group has been skulking around Ottawa, hoping to find a suitable location to erect a memorial commemorating prairie suffragettes, who petitioned and fought to have "women" declared legal persons, which lead to equal rights for women in Canada.

The snag is that one of the "Famous Five" being venerated happens to be Judge Emily Murphy (1868-1933), a rabid racist and vengeful originator of the Canadian drug laws that continue to send people to jail. It seems upon review that Judge Murphy fought with equal vigour against Chinese immigration to Canada, and openly abused her position as "the first female magistrate in the British Empire" to wrest the civil rights she helped secure for her sisters from the Asian community in Canada. In particular, celestials in the west coast cities who opposed the hated "Chinese Head Tax" of $500.

Her book "The Black Candle" (1922) was a greatest hits expansion of a series of articles published by Canada's own Maclean's Magazine, under her commercial pen name of "Janey Canuck", a quaint alter-ego supplementing her role of muck raking executioner and Suffragette Commando.

Judge Emily Murphy pumped out a lot of poison in her pot boiler exposŽs, and she put muscle behind her sordid opinions to pass them into law, hastily adopted and unevenly enforced, which remained unchanged as Canadian drug policy until the early 1970's.

Judge Emily Canuck was the Harry Anslinger of Canada. Her pen cut down innocent hemp because she only saw one leaf of the tree of life, and not understanding, she ended it all in the domain of the wicked witch of the west.

Apparently, not everybody hates a tyrant, and "The Famous Five Foundation" president and founder Francis Wright has invited 18 artists to prepare ideas for a suitable monument (figures must be at least six feet tall) glorifying Jeckyl and Hyde Judge Janey and her quartet of base metal buddies. A million dollar feminist funeral memorial project, benefitting dead women.

Spokehuman Ms Wright is well meaning, but a trite uninformed about delicate matters concerning the public character of one of her bronze goddesses. Hangin' Judge Murphy's unnurturing disregard for anyone she didn't get along with helped produce tri-decade drug wars, international havoc, and the destruction of millions of human lives at the expense of billions of dollars. These are reasons enough to sack her worship from the feminine configuration as unworthy of such posthumous accolade. Otherwise, no problem.

The founder of the Famous Five Foundation for feelgood feminine fantasy, Ms Wright, feels "these women are heroes and nation builders. We want their contributions to enter Canadian consciousness."

Well, Judge Canuck had a major problem with consciousness manipulation from the beginning, and she didn't handle it very well. Take a note there Francis, you might have to live with a bronze bitch in your basement, waiting for a garage sale.

Additional funding for the Famous Five will be gouged from femo-necromancers attending a series of scheduled brittle lunches and snooty dinner parties across the country. The group hopes to capture strokes from female senators, and really do something for dead women everywhere.

Ms Wright would like to do right and says the Foundation plans to market books, videos, museum exhibitions, and establish a scholarship.

By Dr Alexander Sumach

(Ms Murphy is quoting a Los Angeles County Chief of Police on the effects of marijuana.)

"...persons using this narcotic smoke the dry leaves of the plant, which has the effect of driving them completely insane. The addict loses all sense of moral responsibility. Addicts to this drug, while under its influence are immune to pain. While in this condition they become raving maniacs and are liable to kill or indulge in any forms of violence to other persons, using the most savage methods of cruelty without, as said before, any sense of moral responsibility."

An addict who died this year in British Columbia told how he was frequently jeered at as a Ôwhite man accounted for.' This man belonged to a prominent family... and used to relate how the Chinese pedlars taunted him with their superiority at being able to sell the dope without using it, and by telling him how the yellow race would rule the world.

They were too wise, they urged, to win a battle, but would win by wits. They would strike at the white race through Ôdope' and when the time was ripe would command the world...

Some of the Negroes coming into Canada - and they are no fiddle-faddle fellows either, have similar ideas, and one of their greatest writers has boasted how ultimately they will control the white men.
 

For More Info

If you'd like to become involved with the Famous Four Fucked up Fifth Foundation, leave your message at their Calgary Offices (403) 245-6453.