Smoking it up at the Cannabis Cup

The King of Cannabis
When it comes to Cannabis, Holland is King. Our planet knows of no other society that approaches the Dutch standard of civilization. Tolerance and freedom are not just words in Holland, they are cherished and practiced. The fact that for the past decade they have allowed High Times to hold a Cannabis Cup in Amsterdam is a testament to this town's heart.
Thirty years ago, brave Dutch stoners took on their community in an effort to be recognized as legitimate humans, with the right to partake in an ancient ceremony involving cannabis flowers and their resins. Today there are 350 coffeeshops in Amsterdam and about 1000 more across Holland. These coffeeshops specialize in stocking a variety of buds and hashish, both domestic and imported.

My Dream Job
    My assignment was to judge the entries of the ninth annual Cannabis Cup and report my findings to Cannabis Canada. My dream job!
    I had initially intended to categorically test small samples and record my observations. Had I been put in a room with all of the samples in one place that may have been possible, but the Cup was organized more as a coffeeshop crawl. It was like a crazy car rally, where the contestants get lost while zooming around trying to acquire various treasures.
    Somehow I managed to try almost all of the entries, yet since I didn't try every one I decided not to cast my ballot. Instead I simply devoted myself to finding the best bud and hash in Amsterdam, wherever it might be.

The Grey Area
One of the most popular shops entered in the Cup was always so busy I couldn't even get in to buy and try their herb. This was The Grey Area, purveyors of Blueberry, Mongolian Indica, and their Cup entrant, Bubbleberry. All quality herbs indeed.
I saw and smelled their buds at the Sagamartha Seeds booth in the Hemp Expo, but unfortunately they did not have any samples. However, an anonymous judge was kind enough to share a few tokes of his Mongolian Indica with me one night. It tasted like mangoes.

The Green House
    The Green House had fine entries, as one would expect from such a prestigious shop. They had a pair of wonderful plants in their Hemp Expo booth, White Rhino and White Widow. The Widow looks fantastic and has incredible crystal structure, but not much smell or flavour.
The White Rhino was definitely a contender. It's a high yielder, with a very dominant main cola shaped like a tusk, and just as thick. The bud was potent as well, and mixed with the Green House hash entry, Baba's Holy Balls, it went to work on my vision. I'm sure it would be great for glaucoma sufferers.
    The Green House told me they supply this bud to Dutch chemotherapy patients. Their house breeder also told me that he used an Australian strain (Mulanimbee Madness) to develop the White Family. He claims the Madness is the most potent pot he's seen on this planet.
    One night this same fellow pulled out a little blondish finger of White Rhino crystals; we smoked it in a foot long pipe an onlooker pulled out of his vest. Delicious, thanks brother. Their hash entry, Baba's Holy Balls, was excellent. When at the Green House you must try them, although I'm certain you couldn't go wrong with anything on their menu.

The Sensi Seed Bank
The Sensi Seed Bank, that venerable Dutch institution, always makes a fine showing. The Dronkers run a reputable business, known for providing quality seeds for decades. They are kind people and it shows.
Every year they have arguably provided the most quality samples, gratis, to the judges. Their Jack Herer is delightful, smooth and satisfying. Joints abounded of this hazy strain, as well as a new one, Jack Flash (Jack Herer X Skunk).
Alan Dronkers let me roll up a nice spliff of his Northern Lights #5 X Haze at a party. It put a big smile on many faces and was well grown and cured, something I couldn't say for all of the contestants.

Rusty Nails and Lawnmower Mouth
The entrants that lacked a loving grower included Serious Seeds, as smoking the little joints that they distributed was like sucking on a rusty nail. They were chemsalt flavoured schwaggy bottom bits that had clearly only been dried overnight.
When pressed on the issue of distributing such obviously inferior cannabis at the Cannabis Cup, the proprietor said "I know it's the schwag, but come on man, it's free!" Crackle, crackle.
The owner of KC Brains Seed Company told me that it would be impossible to try any of their herb anywhere in Amsterdam, because it was reserved only for the small circle of celebrity judges. When he found out I was judging for Cannabis Canada, he pressed into my hand two florets he snipped off a chunky green bud of outdoor KC33.
I rolled a nice sized fatty of the green, but it was a little too green for my taste. Lawnmower mouth is a recurring problem in Amsterdam. It was fairly potent bud though, I'm sure it could be grown and cured well.

Dutch Passion
Getting back to the good, I loved the Haze X Skunk from the Dutch Passion Seed Company. It tasted mild, with a smooth and creamy smoke. It was well cured and well grown, producing a beautiful sativa high that lingered for hours.
Dutch Passion is well known for their quality strains, indoors and out. The owner, Henk, has been breeding twenty years, and he knows his pot. His Green Spirit has become a staple of commercial growers everywhere, and the Oasis is very popular as well.

Lucky Mother's
Moving on to Lucky Mother's, we enjoyed the Mother's Milk, another smooth sativa with a creeping, vibrant buzz. A few bong hits of their Nepalese Pollen right after the Mother's Milk had come on helped me to feel like I was back where I belong.
The sounds of home were also comforting, as they were playing Dick's Picks, and more show tapes later. Many of the coffeeshops play constant techno, which eventually becomes an annoying sonic backdrop to what could otherwise be a great environment.

De Dampkring
Any review of the Cannabis Cup would be remiss not to mention De Dampkring Coughing Shop. It reminded me of Cheers, except before I could order a beer this friendly Dutch guy handed me the velvet hose of an excellent authentic glass and brass hookah, and the bowl was glowing with a perfect mixture of Blonde Moroccan and tobacco. A delightful greeting indeed.
The hash gave me a heady buzz immediately. I was glowing as I queued up to the bar in anticipation of their bud entrant, White Russian. This is a cross of the White Widow and AK47. Excellent bud. Nothing special in the flavour but certainly not offensive, and definitely a contender for potency.
Their AK47 tastes kind on its own, and the Widow develops the crystal structure, producing a very impressive combination. The glands were long, gnarly and twisted. The buds looked wickedly crystally under the microscope they had on the bar, although you didn't need a microscope to see the crystals. The bud looked like it was covered in a chromatic resinous mesh.
They also sell beer in this wonder pub, so I can't wait to return and wile a way a few more hours there. De Dampkring was renowned for its generosity in previous Cups, to the point were the police told them to tone it down. They supplied delicious sweets and cakes to their patrons this year, and it was easy to feel welcome here. Kudos to De Dampkring!

The Very Best Bud
Unfortunately, the very best bud I smoked all week was not entered in the Cup. It was grown in Oregon one year ago, and stored in a safety deposit box since then. It consisted of a variety of small samples of seeded bud. These were the parents of Flo and Blue Velvet, and they were cleaned and rolled by the breeder himself.
This pot was the most electric I smoked in Amsterdam. This guy has been breeding for twenty years and he takes it seriously as an art rather than a pure science. I found this reassuring, as I really respect this man's work and his ability to pull it off in such a repressive nation. He was quietly brave and happily pleasant, way to go.
This is the man that brought you Blueberry, however he did not grow the commercial version now available in Amsterdam, and was disappointed by what was going around representing his strains.
His herb made the hairs on my neck tingle, a full on stoning that covered all the bases. I hope I run into him again!

The Queen of Nederhash
    The best experience I had smoking Nederhash was with the Queen of Nederhash herself, Meila the Pollinator Lady. When I asked her what her favourite bud for the cup was she replied, "I don't know, I don't really smoke bud. I smoke hash." She then pulled a beautiful chunk of blonde hash from her pocket. It was made from freshly pressed, pliable crystals with a heavenly scent.
    I asked her what strain it was from and she said Misty. I had smoked this bud the night before at Positronics and found it quite tasty with an effective high. Meila's hash was perfectly clean and tasty. We shared a cigar of it the Dutch way, with tobacco, and it was full-on delicious, even though I am not a big tobacco fan.
    Meila deserves a Cannabis Cup for revolutionizing the way we think about trimmings. High Praise to Meila, Queen of the Dutch Hash Scene. She is so friendly and warm you feel as though you've known her your whole life.

Worth Mentioning
    It's worth remembering that many of the coffeeshops in Amsterdam decided not to enter the Cup. It just brings mobs of tourists into their cozy little shops that cradle the locals from the hustle and bustle of city life.
    I liked going to the quiet shops that weren't on the cup tour and asking for their favourites. Generally speaking the staff everywhere are golden, super friendly and patient, and their recommendations are to be trusted.
    Some of the notable ones included the Other Side's Katsu, purrfect nuggets of indica rock buds that sock it to you. Also Cum Laude's Shoshanna, and the Skunk at Mellow Yellow was pretty nice too.
Stix deserves mention as nice, clean, quiet shop. It had wood paneling, jazz and above average offerings. I tried their NL X Shiva, NL X Citral, and several of their hashes. All were excellent.
    I also discussed the coffeeshop business with part-owner Rose. She told me the hardest part of running a coffeeshop is keeping your menu stocked with high-end items.
    There is a lot of competition in Amsterdam to have the best among three hundred and fifty shops. This demand for the newest and best is reflected by rising prices. Everybody wants to try something new. Very few smokers have a specific favourite, so the emphasis is on which of the quality herbs is at its peak of readiness.

Patience is a Virtue
All of the bud in Amsterdam is so dry that you don't need scissors, it crumbles readily into an easily rolled consistency.
I find that the majority of their bud is picked about two weeks earlier than I prefer to harvest it. The Dutch buds are largely puffy orange pistils, with tiny calyxes. The bud I generally prefer has puffy, swollen calyxes and shrunken pistils. I say patience is a virtue.

Other Nice Highs
    What else should I mention? The Bluebird has an excellent menu, especially for hashish lovers. I had their Temple Balls, but it's all good.
    Avalanche, the Bio entry from Dutch Flowers, did a good job at getting my heart going during one of the duller seminars at the Pax Party House.
    One of the American independent entries caught up with me there as well, the legendary Alaskan Matanuska Valley Thunderfuck. The breeders showed me pictures of their garden as I smoked a nice cone of this pedigreed strain. It was on the money. The plants appeared to be extremely heavy yielders in the photos. The Thunderfuck tasted like red grapes, and was smooth and stony. Congratulations fellas.
    BC expatriate Darren Morgan laid some of his Love Bud on me, and in all honesty it was some of the sweetest tasting herb I sampled all week. A warm glow accompanied it.
    A nice guy named Chris from Long Island smoked me a bowl of AK47, from I know not where, but it was delicious and nutritious. Quality smoke for igniting rapidfire conversations.
    CC photographer Barge scored a nice sack of Purple Haze from Goa Coffeeshop. The stem was green but the bud was so purple it was almost black. Nice bud.
    Sensi Star was a lovely bud from Paradise Seeds, but in very short supply as the seed company was only trying to woo a few choice judges. I don't want to sound like a sour grape, but I believe they should be impressing the public that buys their product. Display alone is simply not enough.

Quit yer Bitchin'
    High Times is phenomenal to maintain this fabulous tradition in the city of tolerance. It takes a great deal of hard work by many dedicated people to make this happen. I heard a lot of complaining about the venues being too small and there not being enough free herb, but I say: who is doing it better?
    The Cup is a monumental undertaking and all those involved should be thanked profusely, especially the Dutch.
Sample Grams
    My only suggestion is that a sample of every competing variety should be included with the judge's kit, even if this raises the cost of the pass. They could even be numbered but not named, for real fairness. They could also thin out the competition so that only the cream is represented on the card.
    The competitors could sell their entry to the Cup at wholesale price, so the gram samples in the judge's kit would involve a substantial savings for the judge. This would be better than the wild goose chase of having to buy each gram retail, a thinly veiled attempt by many to sell overpriced retail on a grand scale.
    Not that I'm complaining, I loved the Cup. I just want to see the best herb in it. I really don't think it's fair to enter something that is not easily available to every judge. What is the point?
    Smart contestants could still give away extra quantities to the masses at events if they desired, but the novices wouldn't be as likely to be swayed by the hype.

White Rhino from the Greenhouse. A potent high yeilder with a dominant main cola shaped like a tusk.

The People's Choice
    From my own judging and from inquiring amongst other judges, I decided that either White Rhino or White Russian would take the cup. It was White Russian for those of you that haven't heard yet. The people's choice.
    I say this because I heard one of High Times' main men laugh at the masses lining up for their passes, and remark that these people don't know how to judge pot. I bit my tongue then, it was the first day of the week. But I must say pot snobs are the worst.
    People flew from all over North America to sample Amsterdam's finest cannabis. For many it was the trip of a lifetime. People that devoted take their herb pretty seriously. High Times did a fantabulous job of putting it all together. Keep up the good work guys!
    Someday Canada will have it's own Cannabis Cup, once we've shown our nation's "leaders" that they are going in the wrong direction. Then again, we may not be able to wait!